This is a guest post from a great friend of mine and the most talented writer I know, Kyle Rutty. You can get his take on relationships, Facebook stalking and the rest of his world views at his comedy blog FindgingWood.com.
The movie Hangover was similar to my college experience: hazy, hung over, blurred, and a complete disregard for responsibility. Now my out of college experience is a little different. If I had to compare it to a recent movie, I would say it is similar to the movie 2012; a catastrophe that brings about absolute chaos in my life.
I say this because college was safe. Not physically safe, shots of tequila at 4am isn’t real safe, but mentally safe, because I did very little to expand my horizon as a person. If you asked me “Who I Am” in college my response would pay a lot of homage to my personality and little to do with goals, passions, and what I want out of my life. Of course, ask me “Who I Am” on a Saturday night in college and I would probably given you a drunkenly profound response as I shove a burrito in my mouth and spout out Anchorman quotes. AKA: I had no idea who I was or what I wanted.
However, from the moment I grabbed that diploma and left the bubble I call college, I was forced to honestly face myself; the one person I was successfully able to avoid with booze, girls, midterms, and a “what are you doing tonight” text every two hours. And with all the distractions removed from my life, what I found wasn’t pleasant. Now the easiest thing I could have done was just kept my safe job out of college, find more distractions, and live an uneventful and uninspired life. Deep down I would have known I settled, I would have known that I could have been more, but as long as I had a bubble of distractions, I would have been just fine.
But I chose a different route, and in doing so, was forced confront those deep hidden insecurities that lay dormant within me for years and years. But when the layers began to fall away, so did the insecurities, and so did the desire to just “fit in,” or to meet everyone else’s expectations of who I should be.
And this led me to my passion– my answer to what I wanted most out of life. Surprising enough, it wasn’t a really hot girlfriend or a million dollars; it was to reach people through writing. Suddenly I had a purpose, it all seemed so clear. In a crazy turn of events, I left my safe job in one of the economically worst situations we have seen in decades. But it was what I needed to do. It was what I had to do. I will never say it’s easy to do what your passionate about, because passion is synonymous with you — you meaning everything that encompasses yourself, not just the good stuff, but the bad stuff as well.
Am I doing what I want to do now? Yes! Am I successful from a business standpoint? Not yet, but I don’t care, and that’s all that matters. If you told my college self that he would want to be an aspiring writer at the age of 23, he would have laughed at you and then asked you if you wanted to take a shot with him. But that’s the best part about my out of college experience. The fact that I was able to remove the fake insecure shell I carried for years and came to discover the real me, the one that is ultimately being true to himself and chasing what he wants most out of life.