Posts Tagged ‘friends’

The Mastermind Retreat (A Few Days Like Thoreau)

Thursday, January 12th, 2012
I have some incredible friends… Truly incredible, inspiring, change the world type friends. Last Thursday three of these friends and I traveled up to the remote woods of Napa to get away from the fast paced life of the valley and SF for a few days.  However, it was less about pressing the “reset button” and more about charging up the console for 2012. We called our four day retreat a “Mastermind Retreat”.  The purpose: to create a platform for shared wisdom, knowledge and to have us all come out in planned action mode, working to accomplish our goals and mission for the year.  Sounds valuable and virtuous right?  Well…with a group of guys in their mid-twenties and no sight of anyone else for a few days you get some behavior that is far from valuable and virtuous.  No need to elaborate.  Still, the actions and results are worth elaborating on…

Thursday Night

A large cardboard box that has been converted into a bookshelf dumps out about 20 books that are cornerstones of business, self-development, spirituality and more.  As a group that has been firmly dedicated to self growth for a long time, we dive right in to accessing the titles, reading the intros and smelling the pages (don’t act like you never did that before your Kindle).

We relax around the cabin coffee table and openly discuss what we’re looking to get out of the weekend.  One thing is consistent, we all stated in some form that we are looking to create unprecedented results in our lives and a solid framework that will lead us to those results. Kyle passes out a work book that was created by Seth Godin and Zig Ziglar  that’s called “Pick Four“.  This will be our tool book for creating results in our work over the next three months. Soon after it’s off to bed…

Friday

In the Napa woods…it’s hard not to wake up early.  I get up, walk around the property to take in the views and take deep breaths of pine soaked air. After a little reading and solo time we get together at the dining room table at the cabin to start brainstorming our goals for this year.  Recently I have been a bit resistant to setting hard goals for a few reasons.  First off, much of the time they’re too linear, they don’t allow room to discover new possibilities or to iterate.  Second, if you work top down off a big dream, it’s often too hard to create small incremental progress.  If you can’t break a large dream into little goals, you set your self up for failure and to be disempowered.  However, this time I was dedicated to discussing what I felt works and doesn’t…and even more open to adopting a new system for track results. With that all aired out…we listed out all our high level goals…dreams.  I surprised myself as I found I wasn’t dreaming big enough…point taken.  From there our job was to filter those goals based on the feasibility of getting it done in 3 months and the importance to you and your overall mission.  And the there were 11.  Next step, write down “why” you chose that goal.  The impact achieving the goal can have on you and others (a super super important part of the exercise).  Lastly…break the list down to the top 4 and make each goal super specific and results oriented.  Before fully commiting to those 4 we all decided to sleep on it…but it was only 2pm at that point so we went down “into town” at that point. While in town: the most freakishly astounding display of synchronized flying by over a thousand black birds–no joke (D-Man…get the video up!). We went back up the hill and had an awesome dinner with the guys, my dad and step mom.  We switched out the wine for coffee and decided to pull and all night “hack sesh”.  Kyle was writing a new book he’s working on, Derek got strategic with ConvoSpark, Cam when off to bed early and I started working on some Be Social Change work that I have been wanting to work on for the past few weeks. An “all nighter” ended up being a strong session until 2am (I swear Napa is in a different timezone).

Saturday

Never felt so fresh after 5.5 hours of sleep. After pacing around the property for a while I decided to post up at the bottom of the hill to meditate.  Since I had set a goal to meditate consistently, there was no better place or time to dive deeper into myself.  For a moment my mind was still, I felt the profound power of silence and when I finished the session I felt more alive than I have in some time…like woah. On the theme of “wholeness”, you know…mind, body spirit, it was time to give the body a little love.  Well…maybe love isn’t the right word.  Trainer Derek put Kyle and I through an intense MMA inspired work out.  We were not fully functional after. After regrouping a bit, it was time to fully commit to our detailed goals.  We gathered around the table…took out our notes books, and on the signature page, put the pen to the paper (Kyle wanted to do the good old fashion way, mark it in blood).  Here’s what I committed to:

  1. 275 drop-ins on JoynIn by April 1st
  2. Release the Be Social Change MVP
  3. 100 sales (more details on that later :) )
  4. Meditate 60 out of the 90 days.

After the signing, we ended up reading some more, having breakout discussions, then went into town.  It was time to enter back into the world of beer, YouTube and unproductive chatter (you know…the norm).  We ended up going to an awesome South American restaurant, drank a few beers and watch Drew Brees be a bad bad man to the Lions secondary.

Back up at the cabin we took a detour from our work and watched 10 too many Chael Sonnen (best of Chael) and Fula videos (best of Flula).  We then moved to a semi productive mode by playing a game of Apples to Apples with a “pitch your card” twist…people got buzzed, it got heated, we all became better sales people. …ya I know what you’re thinking…”this is not how Thoreau lived at Walden Pond”…ya we know.

Sunday

Last day…woke up (a bit later)…meditated…connected with the guys. Sunday was all about being pragmatic and action oriented.  We went one by one discussing an individuals needs, roadblocks and ideas when it came to there four goals.  We pulled from out wide range of skilled and experiences to help fortify each other’s plans.  We know from experience than when a simple yet actionable plan is not laid out…it’s easy to stray away from that goal due to inertia alone.  We spent a good four hours diving deep into each goal, highlighting weaknesses, discussing strategies and ultimately making each goal a living entity. It was then time to say goodbye to our very own Walden Pond.  We all took time to reflect on our short yet transformative time in the Napa Woods by walking, reading and finding other ways to go deeper into the present moment.

What I Took Home With Me

You know that post vacation feeling?  You come back home bronzed and relaxed to a world polar opposite of the one you came from.  This trip was not like that…it was not a vacation…it was a retreat.  It helped us dive back into our world of chaos more powerfully than before.   To take the chaos…look at it as art, yet approach it scientifically. I came back to my new apartment that I share with my girlfriend excited for new possibilities.  I came back with map that will help guide me towards my destination…everyday I take out my machete and start blazing the trail that is beginning to look clearer and clearer. It’s important to regroup, refresh and reestablish yourself.  I would suggest everyone finds there own way to create their own retreat.  A time and place where you can work off an clean canvas and organize your palette.

Having Foolish Friends is a Great Thing!

Monday, January 25th, 2010

friends daniel gibson brenton gieser

Most likely this post will come off as a shameless plug for my good friends’ websites, startups and projects…so be it…they deserve it!

After spending a little time with one of my best friends and checking out his ridiculously hilarious, well written and random website Finding Wood (launches today might I add) something struck me as it sometimes does.  I thought to myself: my friends group of friends are like no other group!  I am proud to say that many of us bypassed the young professional martini sipping lifestyle for the young entrepreneur 12am tea drinking  culture.  I am excited to say that amongst my friends, unordinary has become ordinary.

I have grown through my 20′s along side the best friends a person my age could wish for.  Yes we show each other nothing but support and love  but far beyond that we never allow each other to settle.  Each of us has sacrificed comfort and conventional success for our dreams (or at the very least what makes us happy).  I am proud to have the friends I do and owe much of my current and future achievements to them.

Daniel: My best friend and constant supporter.  This guy has backed me since the  2nd grade.  I’ve never met a person more capable when he puts his finger on what he wants.  I’ll always look up to Gip.

Kyle Rutty: His creativity scares me…literally.  Someday you will see him on SNL, but for now you can find him at FindingWood.com.  He has lived the classic story of  becoming a special government agent only become a coffee shop literary samurai (but I’m sure you have heard that before).

Wafi: Waf is a friend that will never leave your side, even if you want him to.  His knack for business and his ability to get things done impresses the hell out of me.  He always seems to be doing something big…next month is is launching MyCollegeSpot.com.

D Man: Derek taught all my friends that education must be pursued far beyond school.  Even better, real life education comes from investing in yourself and your business.  He is responsible for teaching me about system based businesses.

Killa Cam: Cameron never settles.  He lives life the way it is ought to be lived…whatever way he wants to.  He has built CampusBooze.com up to be the main resource for thousands of college students trying to get drunk for cheap.

Austin- Every group of friends needs their Tim Ferriss.  You know the guy that travels the world while building his startups?  Ya that guy.  He teaches the world how to do it at FullFoundation.com.

Sam- Sam will change the face of preventative health care.  He better, I’ve listened to him talk about it for too long for him not to.

Cath- I have never met a college student with so much drive and vision.  When I was her age I couldn’t see past Thursday nights in Downtown Santa Barbara.  I am so proud to be her boyfriend!

Plus all my other great friends who are foolish like me….JC$, Javi @ StuVu.com, Max….the list goes on.

If I could recommend on thing for young folks right out off college, entrepreneurs or anyone trying to get the most out of life, it would be to surround yourself with abnormal people…they will help you live an abnormal life!

Business Ventures With Friends. The Good, Bad & the Ugly

Monday, December 14th, 2009
Hands in

Hands In! Maybe?

If you are an entrepreneurs, it’s very likely some of your friends are entrepreneurs.  Which is fantastic right?  That means you can come together for ideas, advice and other forms of insightful collaboration.  Of course, there will be many opportunities for you to pursue ventures with your friends.  Pretty exciting stuff, I know.

However, one must consider the possible pitfalls of partnering with friends on ventures (impressive alliteration eh).  Many times friendships get tested and business decisions get clouded.

With a talented group of friends and more and more partnership opportunities coming my way, I have to consider the good, the bad and the ugly before I jump into a new venture.  And you should consider it as well.

The Good

The single most important thing is that expectations are set.  There must be one vision and one team moving in unison.  If they fall off track a bit, they have the wherewithal to hop back on and get moving in the right direction.  Since birds of a feather flock together, your friends most likely have some of the same skills, talents and interested.  That shouldn’t mean that roles and positions aren’t set.  Egos may be tampered with when one friend is named the CEO over another but a group must define roles in order to have expectations met and the organization operate effectively.  Setting expectations and defining roles based on each individual’s strengths and desires is the only way a business friendship combo can work.

When all is accounted for and everyone is on the same page, you can only imagine the benefits.  You are working side by side with people you care about on a project you care about.  There is nothing better in this world then spending quality time with good friends.  If you are able to start up a successful business with your friends, you live the virtues of spending quality time with them while changing the world and making money.  Doesn’t get much better then that.

The Bad

Business decisions sometimes takes emotionless fortitude to move the right direction.  On the other hand, for friendship’s to flourish, one must have the capacity to empathize with their friends on a deep emotional level.  If you cannot find a balance between the two temperaments, be prepared for a short and bumpy ride.  To find this balance the team must be committed to being as open as possible.  Disclose all, from you finances to your feelings.  If you stumble across a partner that is not willing to be open, pick up your bags and roll out.

Say you do get to the point where each team member can strike a balance between business and friendship and prove to be open with each other.  You’ve made it passed step one.  However, in step two, money is something that will need to be accounted for.  Many entrepreneurs have the idealist notion is that you create something great and the money will fall into place (I still work under the notion…yes I am a romantic).  But at some point some type of reality sets in, either your costs are piling up or money is flowing in (hopefully the later).  If your friends and business partners does not have a clear picture of their capital contribution things are liable to get bad.  Never, never let friendships break up over money.  Be smart and bring in a trusted third party part time CFO if you need to, the money is worth the money.  If you are in this position, go talk to my friend and financial expert Trishan. He is a honest and knowledgeable guy that will set up your company’s finances for you.

The Ugly

My first venture Blacktop Hoops is the quintessential example of friendships and ventures turned ugly.  I ended up collaborating with a friend I only knew for a short period of time.  We had our differences but since we believed we needed each other we stuck through it.  He later brought his friend on to be our developer.  Communication was terrible and there was far too much tippy toeing around people’s feelings.  End result, is that the partnership is now dissolved.  Learn the whole ugly story here.

Conclusion

Make sure you know what you are getting your self into before you jump into it.  Set expectations, roles and most importantly make sure your group compliments each other.  No good friendship is worth ruining over business and no good business worth ruining because of a friend. 

Have you worked with friends before?  What have you learned from the experience?

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